SCOTT DETROW, HOST:
Actor Jimmy O. Yang says he often felt invisible as an immigrant. His family moved to the U.S. from Hong Kong when he was 13, and he says that experience of invisibility is captured in his new Hulu series "Interior Chinatown." He plays Willis Wu, a waiter who's trapped as a background actor in a police show, an experience he's familiar with.
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JIMMY O YANG: I mean, when I first started acting, I was a background actor. And then I had a two-line part. I was Chinese teenager No. 2. You know, I was person in line. But all those parts, I felt like - even those small parts, I felt like I snuck in, and I scored, you know, 'cause I wasn't supposed to be here. That's how I felt.
DETROW: Yang's starring role comes after making a name for himself in side roles in "Silicon Valley" and "Crazy Rich Asians." He joined Rachel Martin on NPR's Wild Card podcast, where well-known guests answer big questions about their life drawn from a deck of cards. Here's Rachel.
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RACHEL MARTIN: One, two, three.
YANG: I'll pick No. 1.
MARTIN: OK. What do you admire about your teenage self?
YANG: Wow. Wow.
MARTIN: Jimmy, I'm not messing around.
YANG: This is so unlike me to try to congratulate myself. You know, I mean, to admire myself?
MARTIN: Yeah.
YANG: That's very hard.
MARTIN: Oh, that's interesting. That's not your natural default.
YANG: No, I don't think so. I think - I had to go to my therapist to talk about how I can't take a compliment. And I'm like, how - what am I supposed to say, like, if people come and say, oh, my God, hey, that show was great? I like - well, I'm like, it's OK. Like, you know, I start saying some stupid things. And then she's like, no, no, just say thank you. Just take it in and say thank you. I'm like, really - that's what people do?
MARTIN: (Laughter) OK. Well, I'll ask you...
YANG: I don't know.
MARTIN: ...I mean, maybe your answer is, I didn't admire anything about my teenage self.
YANG: No, I think I did. I think maybe because I was so young, the ignorance also gave me a fearlessness...
MARTIN: Yeah.
YANG: ...You know, making friends, and I didn't feel bad about myself, although I was quite othered and foreign. You know, I was very positive. I try to have a good time, although it was very difficult. And I think maybe that's how I developed a sense of humor is, although with the limited English language that I knew, I found a way to talk back and fight back, you know, and not let someone get the best of me.
MARTIN: I mean, are you still that fearless, or when you look back, it does feel like a difference? Your teenage self was more...
YANG: I guess I still am in a way because I'm - I don't overthink these kind of things. I overthink many things. I'm very neurotic - it comes to, like, buying a new lamp or something...
MARTIN: (Laughter).
YANG: ...You know, or a new pillow. Forget about it.
MARTIN: Oh, yeah.
YANG: I went through, like, 100 different pillows. But, yeah, I don't know. Just life stuff, day to day, I just go for it.
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MARTIN: OK, three more - one, two, three.
YANG: I'll take the middle one.
MARTIN: Middle, No. 2 - what's an expression of love you're trying to get better at?
YANG: Oh, wow. It's like, talking about love languages. I had a whole bit about this in my last special. Yeah, I think I'm very good at acts of service, you know?
MARTIN: Not everybody knows what these things are. So there's, like, this rubric about love and how you express it. And so you're saying you're good at, like, doing things for the person that's in your life.
YANG: Yeah, like cooking...
MARTIN: Yeah.
YANG: ...You know, actions. And, you know, words of affirmation is not a big thing in Asian culture, I don't think - you know, not how I grew up. So, you know, I would like to get better at...
MARTIN: But like, do you want to do that? Yeah.
YANG: Yeah. Yeah, being more complimentary of people or saying, I love you, like, when I mean it, like, whether to a friend or to a partner or something like that, and being more communicative, even with my family and things like that, being more open, vulnerable, and being a little better with my words of affirmation.
MARTIN: Did your parents embrace that part of American culture?
YANG: They're getting better, I think. My dad gives me a hug now, which is very weird to me, you know? That's not a thing just in our culture. I don't know if we say, I love you, yet. But we are getting a little more vulnerable and open, and sometimes it takes a newer generation like me to kind of break it down and be like, hey - I just want to have an open, honest conversation. I don't want us to, like, get mad at each other and never talk about something. So yeah, they've been pretty receptive, I'll say, whenever I do come from a truthful, real place.
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MARTIN: Three more cards - one, two or three.
YANG: Red now, huh? I'll take the first one.
MARTIN: Does the idea of an infinite universe excite or scare you?
YANG: Infinity scares me.
MARTIN: Does it? Truly?
YANG: Yeah. If it's something that I can - you can put a number, and it could be a billion, trillion, da-da-da-da-da plus one, whatever, it's fine if I can wrap my brain around it. Infinity is something I cannot wrap my brain around, and I think it's why me and probably a lot of people are so afraid of death because you are gone forever.
MARTIN: (Laughter) Yeah, yeah.
YANG: If you're telling me I am dead for a trillion billion million years...
MARTIN: Yeah, but you're not going to know.
YANG: ...And then I'll get to come back for one day, and I'm dead again for - then I'm fine, OK? But if I'm gone forever, very scary.
MARTIN: Yeah.
YANG: So infinite universe is a little scary. Anything infinite is scary. I look at the ocean at night, I get a little scared. It seems so vast and infinite.
MARTIN: Oh, yeah. No, I don't - I actually - I know this is a controversial opinion, but oceans - I like them. I like to be on a beach. It's nice. But I find that - it all very unsettling.
YANG: Thank you - too vast.
MARTIN: (Laughter) It's too big.
YANG: People pay extra for ocean views. I'll pay extra to not look at the ocean. Give me the city view.
MARTIN: The parking lot (ph).
YANG: I'll look at, yeah, your parking lot, your utility closet. You know, don't give me - give me a room with no windows. I'm not paying extra to see the cliff of my death...
MARTIN: (Laughter) That's right.
YANG: ...Into a vastness of infinity.
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MARTIN: Jimmy O. Yang, it was such a pleasure to talk with you. Thank you so much for doing this. The new show "Interior Chinatown" is on Hulu. Check it out. Good luck with everything.
YANG: Thank you so much. I appreciate it.
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DETROW: Follow NPR's Wild Card podcast to hear a longer version of that conversation. Transcript provided by NPR, Copyright NPR.
NPR transcripts are created on a rush deadline by an NPR contractor. This text may not be in its final form and may be updated or revised in the future. Accuracy and availability may vary. The authoritative record of NPR’s programming is the audio record.
